No Good Very Bad Day.....gets Better!

I can think of many different things to do with $200. I mean a lot of things can be bought for $200. No price is ever too much to pay for help for my kid the way I see it. However if you've been recommended to me by a respected Psychologist, and a friend.....I do not anticipate you to disappoint me....but you did. And it cost me $200 to be disappointed, which makes me feel rather sickly. So what am I speaking of? Mine and Perry's initial coaching session at The Affinity Center, it was an hour and a half of stuff I already knew, a lesson on the brain and how it works, going over the stupid questionairs I had to fill out, of which I've filled our on numerous occasions, her looking over the evaluation done at school baffled by the scores...."how can he be high and above average here, and below average here.....blah blah blah blah....." To which she responds with "yeah according to the accessment Perry is clearly classic ADHD....." Whoa....and you went to school for that? Tell me something I don't know! Some other crap about the brain being asleep and the brain being awake and what causes that. At no point during the session did she tell me what they could do for us, or what the possibilities were in plain folks I'm not a clinical psychologist language. She was also kind enough to strategically tell me waking up 45 min before Perry has to get on the bus isn't logical for him, if I expect him to dress himself, yeah ok tell me something I don't know. I am a women ruled by chaos, don't mess with that it works for me. One thing she did tell me was Concerta (the medication Perry takes) is a time released medication that lasts 12 hours. Knew that. But what I did not know, was it reaches it's peak or it's best 6 HOURS AFTER IT'S TAKEN!!!! Wow......well no wonder he seems to be all together and somewhat focused by the time HE GETS HOME FROM SCHOOL...and his teachers are reporting they are unable to get him to focus and he can't sit still. Ahhhhhhhhhh.........Ok so I've been going to a psychiatrist (whom I don't care for) who prescribes this medication, who I've voiced this information to, and he didn't tell me anything like that. Who the hell am I suppose to believe??? The psychiatrist I don't like or the know it all....."how about a lesson on the brain" smarty pants women I just met?? Or the lovely, very helpful, nothing but respect for psychologist who suggested I check out the Affinity Center in the first place, yet didn't inform me of the peak performance of Concerta.....did he not know this?? OMG.....so frustrated.....so I leave the Affinity Center with MORE QUESTIONAIRS, a couple for me and one for each of his teachers. Shelled out 200 bucks, signed a release form, recieved a privacy act paper....(CAUSE I NEED MORE OF THOSE).....took Perry to school, once he was out of sight I cried! Went to work, and did a little discreet cube crying, vowing not to return to The Affinity Center, and giving a shout out to Stacie to pray for me since I was on the verge of losing it. She told me I shouldn't be made to feel this way and to wait for Childrens to call. She just finished a round of assessments for her son, and she was totally pleased with how she was treated by childrens from the moment the started the rather lengthy process. And she lives in Maryland! While pursuing the help of The Affinity Center, I purposefully did not cancel anything with Childrens Hospital, in the event things didn't work out.........THANK GOD...........Feeling extremely overwhelmed and pretty much useless at work, I turned my late arrival into a half day and left early. I had called Ron to inform him of my frustration, and said we need to decide what to do. WE meaning I can't keep feeling like I am the only one dealing with this. So while I was waiting for some pictures to be processed Ron calls me on my cellphone with a "guess who just called......?" Gasp.....Childrens hospital, our first appointment is Dec 6th!!!!! Not only did they call when I was at the peak of my frustration, but my husband who never wants to take responsibility for important stuff, took it upon himself to schedule the appointment, and felt rather confident in doing so! God is so good, why would ever think anything less? Thanks for your prayers folks they work, don't ever think that they don't.

Creativity....

I sure could use some of that. I am a creative person, so therefor, I must make all my christmas cards. Yep I need to make 80 cards, and for me to feel fullfilled they must be done at least 3 weeks before christmas, that leaves me with very little time. I was informed today that this years Army National Guard Christmas party is a dress up affair. I am praying it's not a formal. Back in the day I was all about the formal attire, but now that I am in my mid 30's I am so over it. Doesn't help I've been in 8 weddings including my own.....yowza, I've done my fair share of fancy dressin up. I am sure my husband would be rather disappointed if I didn't attend as I have in years past. I've been to some that were fun, but for the most part they are rather boring and snooty. Not down with it!

Have I mentioned lately how incredibly BORING my job is? I do it well and effeciently for the most part, but GOOD LORD it's amazingly boring. Thank God for the occasional personal e-mail that breaks up the day or it's quite possible I would lose my freakin mind. Oh and Jesus Jams, Coldplay, Green Day and Jack Johnson......save me from losing it as well. My pink ipod, I could not live without. Oh and having good conversations with my co-workers helps also. Thank goodness they all aren't crazy. I mean there are a few that are a little off, but for the most part they are all interesting and intelligent people.

Ok so it's 11pm, Perry's still awake talking to himself and I feel this overwhelming desire to go be creative. So hopefully the kid will fall asleep and I won't be up until the wee hours creating some sort of master piece....I really feel the need to alter something......look out nothing is safe! Seriously considering making my Christmas cards out of Giant Altered playing cards. Oh you think I am joking......don't challenge me, cause I will make it happen.

Mean Reds....

I am under attack! I swear, I don't have anything to be bumbed out about honestly, except maybe a extremely messy house, and a less than helpful husband. He takes a few hours to clean 1/4 of the basement, and has to stop because he's tired. That's great! I mean I am greatful for whatever help I get, but come on, there are some women who clean other people houses all day long, the entire house and they go home and have to take care of a family.

So why can't I just hand my kid his homework, guide him in the instructions and he just does it? Like sits there completes the homework, and he's done. Cause I am under attack that is why some force larger than myself is trying to beat me down. The precious angel is in there writing his spelling words 4 times each and it's 11 pm, some would find that to be abusive......He's got 5 more minutes and then I am surrendering to the unfinished homework gods. So can someone tell me why and intelligent man like my husband not see that "do to much" tuesdays would be less stressful if homework was done after school, and not late in the evening when normal folks are in bed. Why can't this just happen? Is it just that men don't think about those things, cause that's a lame excuse way over used.

So completely bumbed that this Alpha session has come to an end. We do evaluations on the last night and half my table split after the evaluations, and didn't say good-bye. Wow....does that reflect poorly on me as a leader? Did I completely freak them out? I am probably the least threatening or intimidating of any of the leaders. Did I not say enough? Not call enough? I mean granted I did have a head-ache this evening so I may have been a little unpleasant. Ahhh.....I did the best I could with the skills I have. Ok so half of 4 people is only 2, so that's not all bad I suppose. But I hate that I didn't get to say good bye, and thanks for sticking it out for 10 weeks, and find a small group....all that kind of stuff. So as if having the mean reds and a head-ache on the last night of Alpha wasn't enough. I am just not good at the hospitality thing. Like I plan on taking peoples plates, getting drinks for folks and all that stuff, but inevitably someone else jumps up and does it before I get a chance. I'm just slow. So thought I'd pump up my hospitality skills and I made cookies last night for my table. So what happens, one of the people at my table stops at Perkins and gets giant eclairs and the largest brownies you've ever seen. So my cookies looked all generic, stale and lame compared to that. It was very nice of her don't get me wrong, and I am sure my cookies were tastey, but I wouldn't know cause I was eating a ginormous eclair! Yes, yes, mean reds indeed.....must go be sad and cry a bit, and then maybe I'll feel better.

Light

This quote was given to me by a co-worker I am getting to know better through our common interest in all things paper. I shared with her some of the struggles I am being faced with lately. And although she doesn't know me very well, she seems to sense what my hearts desire is in alot of things. Just the fact she thought of me when she read this quote means so much to me.

Light

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light.
Not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves,
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
Theres nothing enlightened about shrinking.
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.
It's not in some of us.
It's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine.
We unconsciously give other people
Permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear;
Our presence automatically liberates others."

Marianne Williamson, used by Nelson Mandela in his inauguration speech.

Name it!

I am all about seeing spiritual warfare and naming it when it happens. That may seem a bit freaky to some folks. It's so freakin obvious when satan shows up in your life. Ecspecially when things are going good, and you feel good about where your relationship with God is headed. It happens a lot, and it's gotten to the point where I expect it. See it for what it is and get rid of it. Like this morning, on the way to church Ron and I are trying to have a conversation that was innocent, but serious, and it turned ugly and it didn't need to. He said some things that weren't nesessary, and so did I. At which point I said, "so how's it feel letting satan creep up on you like that and take over." Ron just laughs, he sees it, I know he does. He is so used to me just telling it like it is and not holding anything back. Satan doesn't like it when we are all snuggly tight with God, so he messes with us. Dang he's such a butthead.

In other news. The alpha leaders got to have dinner at Dave and Anita's tonight. Having dinner at the senior pastors house makes a ginormous church seem a little bit smaller. Also makes me proud to be part of a super cool team, cool enough to be invited. They are all truly servants of God.

I am kind of looking forward to the Holidays, and kind of not. I haven't a clue what I am doing for christmas cards. I have the pictures for them, but don't know what those pictures are going to go into. Oh the pressure. Ok life is officially boring......All I talk about is church and scrappin, and lately mostly church. I mean I suppose that's a good thing, my priorities are right, but I've got nothing else interesting to say? My completely boring and mundane worklife has trickled over into my regular life, and even my extra curricular activities sound insanely boring. Something needs to happen here people. I don't want drama, or something horrible to happen. I want excitment, something super cool and exciting to spice up my life a bit. If nothing exciting happens this week, I am going to pop open a bottle of Riesling, and make Ron watch Jane Austin chic flicks all weekend. OMG........he'd so hate me!

Hooked Up....

Saw a powerful message today at a leaders meeting for church. We watched Paula White, give a message on the Prodigal son, Luke 15. More importantly she spoke about the older brother, you know the one who remained faithful to the father and wasn't off running around getting his party on, but stayed by his fathers side and did his work. How often those who are faithful feel overlooked. Kind of like folks think, ahhhh they got it all together they don't need to be celebrated. Like when the prodigal son returned home, and they threw a party for him. The older brother felt a bit slighted because here he was having his dad's back the whole time, and he didn't get a party. The thing is, we get a party everyday. We meaning those who are faithful. God delights in those who are faithful. And if ain't nobody giving you a party, then you gotta throw your own party for yourself. Throw on some praise music and celebrate yourself. Do something just for you, because you've been faithful. Man my girl Paula sure knows how to tell it like it is.

28"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. 29But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. 30But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
31" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. 32But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "

HG Hook-Up.....

The term HG Hook-up was a phrase pretty much made up by my best friend Abby and I when we were in high school. I would venture to say that she came up with it. Well it's stuck with us all these years. My mother said it to one of her co-workers just yesterday and he totally got it, and plans to use it. Then she tried it out on an older gentlemen who happens to be a preacher, he didn't get it at first, but then once he did, he was way impressed and plans to use it in a sermon. Ha! That's almost like becoming famous right there.
So if you are lost, and are like what the heck is an HG-Hook-up......it literally means Holy Ghost Hook up. We would say it when something really cool would happen to us. We'd be like....."ahhhh that was the HG Hook-up!" Crazy that we still use that, but hey you need to give credit where credit is due that's all I'm saying. Nuff said.....

I could seriously use an HG hook-up right about now! Keep prayin!

Happiness

Some things just make me happy!

Some things are just Scary!

Flora.....

Church was exceptionally good today. It's always good, but God was doing something with me before I even got there, as well as Ron. Ron often seems like a reluctant church attender. But in more recent months, and maybe since his return from Hurricane Relief, he's been more purposeful in his walk. Ecspecially during this series about work. He's not one to search for something better as far as jobs are concerned. He finds happiness where he is and makes it work. Occasionally complains, but is a genuinely hard worker. Heck he's gotten employee of the month at least twice. Not to mention he is one of the Army's hardest working soldiers. He seems to be soaking in how to apply God in the work place, and it's a good thing. Completely changes ones attitude. So why Flora? It was shown at the very end of the service about this little girl from Hondoras. Why did it touch me so much? First of all becoming a believe is completely and simply that simple. As the faith of a 9 year old from another country who heard the message from a sunday school teacher and believed. Didn't question. And said I want that, and I want to take it back to my war torn country. So so precious. My story could not even remmotely be as beautiful as hers. But I was the same age when I said yes to Jesus, and I knew then just like she does, that God would use me for His Greater Glory. I knew at that young of an age that I had a God calling on my life, without a doubt. Prepare to be forever changed, grab some tissues, and allow God to speak to you and his calling for your life through this precious little girl. Flora's Story

When you get to the weekend message page click on video, and however wonderful daves message is on Joseph, if you don't have time for all that and just want to get to Flora's Story, fast forward it to 57:12 around there. Also if you wanna hear an amazing song as well. Scoot it forward to 13:54, Sweetly Broken, which I am. Man we are going to miss Robbie! Hope everyone's week is great, keep praying!

Grown Up?

So I think tonight I became a grown up. How's that you say? I became a "Shareholder" of VCC. Was a bit skeptical when I went to the roll out of the Shareholders thing a while ago. Thought what's this membership at the Vineyard.......Oh boy here we go welcome to becoming a denomination. But then when it came time to sign, did the bible study, signed the agreement that yes you can count on me, I thought it was a done deal and nothing more was needed on my part. Oh no you gotta sign a formal agreement and a pastor co-signs along with you....now they got me. Seriously, in a sense it's like membership, and then it's not. It's more like just what it is a shareholder, I own stock in this place I call my church home. The place that is the foundation of what I believe in and what I base my life on. So yes sign me up. It's totally doing grown up church. There are friends who are about 6-10 years younger than I and they are still at that rebellious stage where they don't want that accountability and want to volunteer when they "got time", or don't want to set a commitment in case something goes wrong and they need to jump ship. Which is totally fine to be that way, but at some point you gotta grow up and care about what happens, and be a part of the big picture. Listening and understanding the vision and the budget.....all those freakin numbers and for the most part I understood what the heck they were saying. So tonight I became and official shareholder, I'm part of the Army, I've got the dog tag to prove it. So cool. Doesn't change the fact that I am still a Jesus lovin maniac.....Just means I am part of an Army of Jesus Lovin Maniacs......LOL.....yes you may quote me on that, it's a good one. I need a T-shirt!
Oh and I met some different folks tonight. Purposefully sat near folks I knew but away so then eventually I'd be surrounded by strangers so I could meet different people. This lovely older couple sat next to me super friendly husband and a timid wife. The even moved in right next to me so there wasn't that stranger space empty seat. And also so that when folks came in late they could easily slip in without walking over folks, so thoughtful. When we prayed you could seriously feel the holy spirit in these folks so cool. As we left, the thanked me for allowing them to sit next to me, and asked if there was anything they could pray for. How cool is that, complete strangers, that's what the vineyard is all about praying for folks you don't know and being real about it. I am confident that these people who I may never see again, will be praying for me. Man I love my church!

Ouch!

Dang it, how does a girl go 15 years with no cavities, then all the sudden she needs a filling. Rather unpleasant experience I must say. I've tried to blog at work before but for some reason it may not post. So we shall see what happens, just feeling the need to let off a little steam.

I've felt so overwhelmed with life lately, I've seriously neglected my domestic duties. Plus Ron's been on vacation so that throws me way off my normal routine. Life is good, busy but good. Alpha is winding down, only 2 more weeks left, then we get a break for a bit than back to it in January. I'd love to carry on with my table as a small group seems they need that. I just don't have the energy to be a small group leader again. Plus after trying to get one rolling last year and it flopped, just don't have the energy. I think it's being a mom of an 8 year old whose involved in more things, leaves little time to be involved in a lot. I need to be realistic, I can have one activity for myself, which is Alpha, one hobby, which is scrappin, the rest is kid time. I need to stick to that formula, or everything becomes chaotic.

God job door is not closed yet........ahhhhhh....the agony. Goes to show I am an incredibly patient person. The doors still open but only a crack for now. When I recieved the news that basically I didn't get it....but then with a for now tagged on to the end, it was wierd I wasn't disappointed at all, I was actually extremely happy. Must have been a God thing, for as much thought, and prayer I've put into it you'd think I'd be laying on the floor crying like a baby. Goes to show God is all over that, he knows where I belong and where my talents and gifts would be of the most use, it's only a matter of time. Who knows I could end up in a foreign land dishing up rice to the natives..........Ha, highly unlikely for now....but someday!

Happy Halloween

Geez my kid, lazy, lazy, lazy! We get to trick or treating and he's all pumped, then after 10 houses he's butt tired and wants to pass out from exhaustion. Drug him around for 2 blocks and gave in to his whines. Someday he'll make it the whole 2 hours.

He sure made a cute pirate. And Zacks costume was dang funny.

Brrrrr.....

How about we go camping in the Smokies this year, in a tent. With the added addition of a small flameless propane heater this should be something any camper could do. Have tent will travel to the mountains no matter what the tempurature. Then theres the fact that it dipped down to 34 degrees....and the tent is made of nylon, with a roof that is entirely made of mesh. Odd doesn't seem to hold heat too well. Neither does fleece blankets for that matter.......now that is just dang funny. More on our polar expedition tomorrow. For now I will be going to my warm bed, in my warm home. Waking up and getting into my warm car, to work where heat is plentiful. I love technology, that allows heat to be readily available anytime anywhere.

Longest ever!

This has been the longest ever I've gone without updating my blog I believe. Must mean life is way busy. And it is. Just wait till we add basketball to the mix, watch practice will be on Tuesday! I always wondered what it would be like to be that person whose life was so busy she didn't even have time to scrap. OMG.....I'VE BECOME THAT PERSON......and I said it'd never happen. It has and I feel so ashamed. It's completely unavoidable. Still officially waiting for that call, haven't heard a peep about the God job, so hold on to your britches faithful fans, I know you are praying so don't quit. I look around at my co-workers who use big life insurance words on a daily basis, and wonder why it is they sound like they know what the hell they are talking about. Do I sound like that? Ever? God I hope not. Promise not to ever bore my blog, stalkers with boring ass life insurance jargon, trust me you'll remove me from your favorites if that happened. Must go pack for camping, bought an ultra cool tent heater, hope it is toasty! Stay tuned on Monday for fabulous pictures of the Moutains.

Nice Weekend....

Well the Alpha Day Away was awesome as usual. The Holy Spirit did not disappoint. Kind of bummed my whole table didn't show, but it was all but one. So that was cool, and they all seemed to be happy with the outcome of the day. My apprentice leader is awesome, he and his wife are a lovely couple, and it's cool to see them grow to be super cool Godly people. Plus he said I was a good leader and that was very flattering. I do try, lack in the hospitality part, but my gifts are elsewhere so I make up for it. Feeling a little disconnected from my close friends lately, maybe because I haven't been to a crop in over a month. I think P's new dose of meds is working better. Don't want to say for sure until we've had a full week of it. Kind of dissappointed in the lack of communication from his teachers. Frustrating when you beg to be involved and you get nothing on the other end. Can't try if I don't know what to do. P signed up for basketball. He knows nothing about the sport, but is willing to give it a try, could be interesting. I hope he enjoys it.

Bleh...

No better way to end a fast but to experience extreme glutiny. Isn't that how it's done? We went to Buca Di Beppo, and ate way too much and spent way too much money. But Ron suggested Olive Garden.....once you've eaten at Buca Di Beppo, Olive Garden seems like fast food or something. I am officially spoiled and snooty! Long day tomorrow must get to bed!

FAST IS OVER!

Unless someone calls me right now and tells me "you can do it!" Too late, I'm done. I made it 40 hours. Ron tried to push me to make it to 48 but he's coming home, and I am not so sure he wants to see me on a completely empty stomach. It was rather interesting what your body does. It wasn't too terrible, but my vision was getting a bit cloudy, (could have been from dirty contacts), and my head didn't stop hurting. It wasn't a full on headache, but......it was just hurting.....I was beginning to get rather uncomfortable and I don' t thing that's what God had in mind. I did some serious prayin, got some clarity on some P stuff, and feel better about other things as well. It was a good fast and I'm glad I made it as long as I did. Hey it was the 40 hour famine.......Jodi style. It did however cost me 100 dollars is scrappin supplies. Hummm.....next time it'll be a shopping fast. Going to go have some soup.

Confessions of a shopaholic who is fasting.....

So what does one do when they are not eating during their lunch hour?? Shop...duh...I'm a shopaholic! For some reason I was thinking when one fasts for spiritual reasons, they shouldn't talk about it. Which is true to an extent, since it is between me and God. But it seems that when I share it with some the why, most understand, and get it, and it has an effect on them in a profound way. Or they are secretly talking about what nut I am behind my back. Whatever that's where the "between me and God" comes in. So why fast? At first there was just one reason, and then as I felt confirmation that fasting was the right thing to do, several other reasons fell into place. It's just a 3 day fast. I say just like it's been easy. Ha Ha....clarity yes, easy not so much. Free lunch at the workplace today to roll out the new vision. Lasagna....right.....gotta go shop, so I headed to Haps. I do feel hungry right now, it's been almost 24 hours, but it's not unbearable. It's completely doable. I've been drinking V8 splash, OJ and water. I did take a few tylenol, cause I have a headache and I had some gum, cause ones mouth gets rather funky when no food is put in it. It may seem wierd but I find myself praying with clarity and more purposeful, I feel like I know more what to say to God. They say when no food is consumed toxins leave your body. Very true. You seem to be very intune to what God is saying when you fast. Full report on how I am feeling tomorrow. And any suggestions what my first food consumption should be on Friday at midnight may be rewarded.

It's Tuesday.....

Ok the do too much day is shifting to Thursday this week. Sorry for the late notice, alot went on today, but most of it shifted to my mama....thanks Mom.....Man thanks everyone for your prayers it's been overwhelming how many folks got my back, you guys are truly amazing. Now can you shift all the prayer doing to my kid. He's having a tough time at school. Kids don't get him because socially he misses cues that most kids would pick up on. Theres a couple kids who get him and just accept him for being Perry, but I'm not even completely sure that he even kicks it with them often. He says he does, but you never know if he's just talking to you to get you to stop asking questions or if he's really telling you the truth. So frustrating. I just don't want folks to pick on him. So we go to the psychiatrist and maybe do some med adjusting. Wish medication wasn't the answer, but the alternative is way way way worse. My prayer is that switching won't have to happen and just an increase would do the trick and help him focus. Or that his teachers would find something that would help him. And that his teachers would "get" him. So so so important. It'd be so easy to view him as a disruption, and just get frustrated and just let him do whatever to keep him quiet and happy. Or that they would be gentle, patient and persistant, and draw him out of Perryland into the land of learning. Ah yes....wouldn't hat be nice. Can we just stay there for a little while?

Ok I knew I wasn't the only one who LOVES Greys Anatomy. I so need Tivo so I can watch these amazing scenes over and over. Check out Heathers blog.....She does a far better job descibing why this show is so good than I could ever. Yes the closing scene is what awesome TV shows are made of. And Yes if I need a major organ removed, can it be Patrick Dempsey who does the cutting? Thanks that'd be great!

It's a Good Thing!

Things that are good at this moment:

• Bookmark making
• Someone paying me to make bookmarks for their friends. (that's kind of fun!)
• Jones Cream Soda
• Splenda
• Cooking a whole chicken in the crockpot
• Eating healthy most of the weekend
• Perry's voice is all raspy because he's got a cold
• Ron comes home this week
• Scenic route paper, beautiful on both sides
• The smell of fabritac glue
• Finding my Art Journal and I may even do some stuff in it.
• Feeling a sense of peace with what God has planned for my life
• Feel like my life is going to dramatically change here soon, don't know why just a feeling.
• Fun mail from Lisa in California
• Pumpkins
• Crisp fall air, seems so clean
• Kate Miner song Overwhelmed (latest blog entry although from August is worth reading, and you can hear some of her music there. Come to the Water is good too)
• Ben Stiller with Jack Johnson, funny stuff
• Greys Anatomy is on tonight
• Wallace and Gromit
• New White Barn Candles (which happen to be on sale for $10) got some fall scents, Creamy Nutmeg, and Cinamon Pumpkin....very nice.

You guys Rock!

Thanks for your prayers. You'll know the outcome soon enough. Just know that I appreciate it more than you could imagine. Now about Jack Johnson. Did I come late to the Jack Johnson party or what. I love him. He's like James Taylor only better and hipper. There's probably some JT fans screaming at their computers right now. Simmer down, my blog my opinion deal with it! Love the silhouette look of this video, and the subtle humor. I think if I was Jack I would have wacked Ben with the guitar towards the end.

Brother stepped up to the challenge of helping his sister. I am all about not realizing what I am going to need until like the day before. I have a leader retreat gig tomorrow morning, not realizing mom sleeps during the day, duh. So brother called for some childcare hook up of his own, so it's a you help me I help you and then we come together and kick it. It all worked out real easy like that, so it's all good. Big shout out to little bro, coming through like that! I think I'll do a little cleaning right about now. A little domestic work never hurt anyone!

Challenge

Ok I am challenging all you prayer warriors who have stepped up and been faithful this far. Tomorrow at 3:30 pm, is a good time to do that amazing praying thing you do.

New INXS for ya! Why all the sudden am I obsessed with a dead guy?

INCREDIBLE DAY!

****PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE DOING THE HEAD SHAKING INXS DANCE!********
Do it with me, head goes up and down in a "yes" motion. Now shake it in the "no" motion, awesome!

Wow, man when you people pray, you ain't kidding. You take this praying thing very serious. I will not devolge (is that a word) to much detail so as not to jinx myself. But WOW! I can't imagine going through a roller coaster of a day like today and not having a God connection. There's absolutely NO way. How can people live like that? I don't get it at all. I can't imagine for a moment having hook up after hook up and not thinking God had a part of that, theres no way coincidences happen like that, completely impossible. Then theres the people I know who don't have the God connection and my gosh, their lives are a royal wreck. I mean honestly I have had catastrophys happen in my life, but was able to come out of it with peace because well God hooked me up with that peace. What do you do if you don't have a God thing going on, no peace, and if you do find peace where does it come from? I can see where the folks I know, have moments of happeness but it never seems like true happeness, theres always the next big catastophy around the corner to push them a little deeper into the hole, till pretty soon you are buried. Or you find immoral means to create a sense of happiness. To which you then beat yourself up over it, and the guilt comsumes you so then you have to medicate yourself to get through the day.....NO THANKS.....I'm not saying hooking up with God equals instant peace in your life, you still have to work at it. But the waves of heartbreak always seem easier and less torturous to me. I'm just speaking by what I see because I've not ever been through an horrible experience without God, but know people who have. Nuff said....rambling craziness, but someone will get something I am sure. Promise to unload the mystery when the time is right!

I am a coward!!!

Biggest coward ever! Terrified of rejection so I avoid being assertive. What is it with me? Thank goodness Abby doesn't read my blog or she'd be all over me about being a coward. Ugh....I suck. I won't get into the why....those who know me well know the why, and that's cool. Man old school INXS....theres enough video's out there to sustain me for a good while, I think I might just hook it up with some INXS till I've used them all. They will never be as they once were. NEVER....got that JD? I was obsessed with Michael Hutchinsen back in the day, he was so dreamy and had good hair, I had that hair.....love it. Never noticed before though....dude he dances like a girl! I like the head bobbers in the background and the dude playing air drums in the referree shirt.....too dang funny. Ok folks need to pray for me to be assertive, cause I can't do it, it'll need to be God if anythings gonna happen. I was actually creative last night, I made bookmarks for folks at my table. I was up half the night cause I procrastinated, but it got my creative juices flowing, and now I feel some mail art coming on, or something in an altered book perhaps.....look out, more artwork in the next few days I promise! Well heck Rob if you read my blog theres your bookmark, won't be much of a surprise. It's so much cooler in person. Ha....love that quote by MLK jr! Incase you can't read it. "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." MLK jr

So so true.

Good Shopper Indeed!

No intentions of buying stuff today, seriously! I'm suppose to be working on some projects, but I felt the lure of Itunes.....it's like some sort of spell it casts on you and calls you into it's presence....creepy actually. So you surf around and suddenly find yourself looking at something rather frightening.......David Crowder, seriously frighten looking dude. But do you have to be pretty to make amazing worship music? I think not. I think he makes himself look scary on purpose, just so you'll close your eyes and worship, because that my friends is what happens when you hear his music. And low and behold he has a new album, which has a super cool looking cover, which means it's has to be good music. It's all vintage looking and funky looking.....what's happening?? Tons of good songs, I'll probably listen to it tonight as I go to sleep, nothing better than listening to good worship music as you go to sleep. You can check out the A Collision E-card it will give you a little taste. Check that bad boy out HERE! Or you can take a listen at the my space thing too...check that out HERE.....GOOD NIGHT!

I Resign!....

I am so done being a grown up right now. I don't wanna play anymore, I want someone else to take over and run things for a while. Too much responsibility. I have to be a good parent, good employee, good daughter, good Christian, good friend,good wife, good stranger....too damn much people. Get me off this crazy train. Oh gotta be a good housekeeper too, I am failing at a lot of those miserably. Those are all the things I need to do and the only thing I can do is be a good shopper. Not good, not good at all.

The door for the God job remains open. I keep thinking it's going to slam shut, but nope still a possibility. Don't want to get my hopes up, yet trying to remain positive since it would be a nice hook up if it pans our the way I think it would. We shall see. If not I know it's just not where God wanted me. Nuff said.

P got in trouble on the bus yesterday. Apparently he is having difficulty staying in his seat, and he hit a kid. Probably cause the kid was trying to make him sit down. Well the Assis. Principle called and left a message to this regard. To which Perry denied all allegations. Although, his integrity was in question since he sits directly behind the bus driver, therefore, the bus driver would actually see P hit or stand up. So he was sentenced to his room till he was willing to share his side of the story. To which he continued to deny all allegations and said they just said he did it. After 2 hours of incarceration, the prisoner wore down, and confessed to his crime. It went a little something like this.

Mommy: Perry do you remember why you are in trouble?
P: Mommy I don't wanna be under punishment anymore.
Mommy: Do you recall the reason for you punishment?
P: Alright Mommy I'll talk about it. (in a wee small voice)
he softly says....."hate to break it to ya mommy, but the bus driver was right, I did hit, and I did stand up.....I'm sorry I lied. but a kid pushed me like this (he pushes his chest)
Mommy: I am glad you told the truth. You'll remain punished until I get home from work tomorrow. If it happens again you won't be allowed to ride the bus anymore. (he actually loves riding the bus.)

The prisoner is now free, and enjoying Fosters Home for imaginary friends.

Stacie wins for funniest link ever....gets kind of raunchy but dang funny! Steve Don't Eat it!
Give the Foo Fighters some love would ya!

No Seriously......

Whose trying to be funny. It's self portrait tuesday, thought I'd sign up for this gig. Because I love to do stuff on Tuesdays. If I could schedule everything to happen on Tuesdays that would be great, because theres just not enough stuff to do on Tuesday. So lets just add to the things we already do on Tuesdays, and self portrait session shall we?
So there it is. Me on a Tuesday, at the end of her DAY FROM HELL! Thought it was smooth sailing once I got to Alpha, and was reassured that the Alpha folks had been praying for me. Wondered why I hadn't completely lost it yet, since things seemed to be going as if I should be stressed, yet I wasn't feeling it. Well that's because folks were praying Duh! Just cause I wasn't handing my stuff over to God (cause I got this remember?) doesn't mean everyone else was for me. Here I am trying to lead people to find the right answers about God, leading them to a healthy spiritual life, and I am suppose to be setting a good example, and I am completely failing at spirituallity 101. Completely distancing myself from God, and not being purposeful with my walk and spending time chatting with the big dude whose obviously making things easy on me and less stressful. Wow what a freakin reality check tonight was. I may have gotten more out of the Prayer talk than the people at my table. I was honest though, so at least they know I'm human. Ok so heres a rundown of the crazy crazy day!

Work half day
Pick P up 1 hour early from school
head to the super cool psychologists office
On time and happy about that.
Get halfway down the road that goes to his office.
Police, yellow crime scene tape, can't get there from this direction
No receptionist at his office
call the other office they can't help me cause they ain't there.
leave message for the doctor, going to be late, police ect....
try another direction
get lost cause I am directionally challenged.
Perry a little concerned that the Police won't let him see the doctor he enjoys
End up making a big 10 mile circle, Police still there, try again.
This time I find it, Perry screams with delight with a raspberry for the police who tried to keep him from his appointment, that now only has 30 min left.
Get to the office and wait....wait somemore, because...no receptionist...and signs saying do not go past this point because of confidentiality blah blah blah....so we wait....
by the time Doc actually heard us out there, we only had 10 min left. Of which Mr. Super cool Doctor we love made those 10 min. quality, so still happy even if I had to pay a co-pay for 10 min.
Head to Meijer for a quick trip to pick up some cool gummy ear buds for my ipod, love them, wanted pink to match but all they had was black, it's all good. The cord is kind of pink. I think this selfish act was when things began to go very bad.
Meet mom at my house for her to take me to get my car that was being serviced, a routine 100 dollar tune up....(barf)....She drops me off, then I head to Alpha.
Is anyone else exhausted yet??? ME!
Alpha so so good, encouraged that folks were praying for me, talk on prayer, table went well folks shared their hearts good stuff. Mom suppose to drop Perry off at church after cubscouts, so after meeting see the junior helper who usually has him, but no Perry, and she's not seen him. Slight panic.
Ok no after alpha meeting for Jodi, must find son.
Head to childcare area, no Perry, and they hadn't seen him all night, he never show'd. What?
I had precise plans of how things were to happen, very easy, everything was communicted properly. Call my house, home phone not working line trouble....NOT....good. Geegaws should have cellphones. Call brothers house, get sister in law all worked up and worried, I was a little concerned, and getting a little anxious, but not yet freaking out, she's an instant freaker outter, always a good balance for us laid back folks, good thing she married my brother also pretty laid back, but me more so than him. So at least someone was paniced, since clearly I was not yet....called best friend, got her to head to house she lives close, to see if Geegaw just forgot?? BINGO, she didn't forget, she was just delayed by a longer than usual Den meeting. And was now waiting for me to come home, but couldn't call from my phone (line trouble remember). So best friend gets to the house, Geegaws getting in her van, and best friends like "mom where ya going?" To which she responds in a frantic response to church to drop off Perry....I'm now going to be late for work. She then asks, Mom where ya been? To which Mom responds......
"the police station..." Screeching tire sound effect, best friend schrieks in horror.....ahhhhh...what happened, OMG is everything ok. Because she didn't remember the fact that I told her the cub scouts were visiting the police station tonight.....Mom said...."cubscouts".....LOL Oh that's right. Best friend took P with her, and I head home, Geegaw headed to work. I get home phone still not working. Talk on cellphone to husband with a run down of the chaos that is my life. Problem is I'd have this drama whether he was here or not, theres just the added bonus that he ain't here. Talk to best friend, cellphone now goes dead.....telecommuncation devices are no longer my friend at this point, any moment now the computers going to fizzle out, I can feel it. Check e-mail and theres a e-mail in regards to the part-time God job.....more stress to think about, how about we get that on Tuesday too. It's the job description of all the responsibilities, which is a huge list to be accomplished as a part-time position......ahhhhh.....are they my gifts? Must pray about that, many many are, but am I up for a non-boring demanding job, when I've been doing boring not stressful for 10 years now? Wonder what God's thinking? I may need to pray, and more importantly quiet myself and listen. I am sure this is probably the longest blog entry to date. HECK IT'S TUESDAY WOULD YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS?
Yes yes, there is something rather disturbing about this, and the fact that I own this pen. It says like 6 different phrases all of which make me smile and laugh with delight, and that's all that matters.
I shall declare Tuesday, "do too much day"! Anyone care to join me? I wouldn't advise it to those who don't have folks praying about your stress levels. Thanks to the folks who stepped up to the challenge of stress this evening. Layni, my best friend, retrieving my child, Sister in law, freaking out and panicing when I should have been but was not, I am sure theres a purpose for that. Brother for checking mom's house, in a timely manner, probably because your wife was freaking out, response time was amazing you should be a police officer. And to Geegaw who seems to be completely oblivious to her children freaking out about her whereabouts and still got to work on time. Theres a lot to be said for punctuallity of that nature and on a TUESDAY no less!

I got this!!!!

****NOT A CRY FOR HELP****

Not to worry people I got this! So I thought I did. Harold (best friends husband) came and started it, since I am not strong enough to get it pull started. I called and he ran right over....love friends like that. Well after trying to figure out how to get the blades to stay down for 5 min....I cut a strip in the front headed to the back, and it stalled out.....WHAT THE HELL....Why does our riding mower have to be from 1976? It has a button that says "push to start" why can't that work? So Harold had headed off to a soccer game, brother had a doctors appointment. So I call my dad, he says. "I'll be right over!" Now maybe I can just get this man to stay here and just do it. Or help me do it! I'll ride you walk we'll have it done in no time. No big deal. We'll see. This is #1 why I don't like to ask folks for help. Wish someone would just schedule themselves to just cut my freakin grass once a week, so I don't have to worry about since it just stresses me out. And #2 why I like to shop on the weekend....requires little stress! Dads here....

Update: Yep he just did it! Even the super high grass around the bee hive. Ron wouldn't cut it because he is allergic to bees. See that's what I'm talking about you call you dad, he takes one look at you cutting grass, and he said let me just do it "fast".....dang I was just making sure it was cutting. Oh and that stupid riding mower....good heavens. He couldn't start it either. So we pushed it back in the shed, and dad got the push mower. 1.5 hours later it's all cut, I made him some ice tea. I'll round up some snapshots for him so he can make some crazy collage and we'll call it even. Good ole, dad, I cried help and he dropped everything and was here in a flash. Thanks Dad, and Harold for having my back! Oh and the kitchen's clean, and the bathrooms mopped. Kids in the process of getting cleaned then it's my turn. A very productive Saturday indeed.

I know, I know, I know......

Ok I realize when theres a bomb that's been dropped on you, that could have the potential of being rather devastating, people just don't know what to say. Kind of like when someone dies. Ok heres what not to say, and no offense if you've already said it to me. "Well it could be worse he could be shipped off to another country." Ok you are talking to the queen of "it could be worse." However, whether he's in another country or the same country, doesn't change the fact that he ain't here helping me deal with life. Sure he's safer here, but who knows there could be another hurricane heading where he is at this point you never know. Have you seen the crazy Crocidiles? To make things worse, they're sitting around waiting to be given something to do. Isn't there a system?? When a new unit comes in you go relieve another unit and keep rotating how hard can it be. But to sit around and do nothing, good Lord you can do that at home in the comfort of your air conditioned home. Oh and our husbands in "top secret" military mode....crazy. It's like they are always in character. Where are you going? "I can't tell you, you never tell military movements." Oh and then all shocked that it's on the news where they flew into. Um yeah, you aren't running and hiding from the bad guys, you are helping clean up a hurricane ravaged city. We can know where you are, seriously it's not top secret. It appears I've been commanded to answer some questions from Stacie.

5 things to do before I die:

1. Go on several mission trips.
2. Be able to read lots and lots of really good books from beginning to end.
3. Lose 100 lbs
4. See my kid graduate college
5. Travel to many foreign countries with my family

5 Things I can not do:

1. Swim well
2. Jump off a diving board
3. Go to the grocery and not buy something I don't really need
4. See without my glass's
5. Not believe God exists


5 Things that attract me to the opposite sex:

1. Good shoes, like cool shoes.
2. Nice hair (um my husband is bald)
3. nice eyes
4. Awesome sense of humor
5. Hears me when I speak


5 things I say most often:

1. Ahforreal....
2. Perry (usually it gets louder)
3. Turn off the TV
4. Come here
5. No


5 celebrity crushes:

1. Jon Foreman (lead singer of Switchfoot)
2. Dave Navarro
3. Danny from the real World New Orleans (ok so he's gay I can fix that!)
4. Chris Martin (lead singer of Coldplay)
5. Sidney Poitier


5 people I want to do this next:

1. Blog stalkers you know who you are.
2. Rochelle Stewart, don't even act like you ain't readin get to typin in the comments!
3. Leah
4. Teri Fode
5. Cyndi

Ah yes that was fun, made me think real hard. Thanks Stacie you're the best!

I'm Tough...really I am!

Well I do pride myself on being a tough women! I mean really I can handle things by myself. Plus I have friends who will help me if I ask. Yeah but theres the part I hate. Asking for help. Hate it, hate it, hate it. I'd rather let the grass grow to my knees than to ask someone to cut it for me, cause I sure ain't cutting it. Sounds like they will be part of the clean up. Melinda said it best, they sure as hell better not take them to New Orleans, and they sit around trying to figure out what the heck they need them to do. Cause if that's the case I'll find them some people to feed. The Army can do that too! How appropriate I took this picture last weekend who knew how very timely it would be?

This is what Military Chaos looks like. Ain't too pretty! 

One Phone Call......

Can change your plans rather quickly. It was Ron's job to decide on dinner this evening. It's friday, and I have to do it throughout the week for Perry and I, so a girl needs a break. So we head to Golden Corral, not my first choice as buffets can sometimes be icky to me. But I enjoy it nonetheless. Ron sits down to begin eating his bourbon chicken, and his phone vibrates. He answers as if the person on the other end can't hear him......"Hello.....what's that.....yeah...." imagine a resturant full of people and him yelling into the phone. This is a person who HATES to draw attention to himself, so it didn't last long. Quickly says lemme go outside and call you back. He gets up and says to me, looks like I'm heading to Louisianna.........and then he leaves. So I sit replaying all the weekend plans we have that I will now either not do, or go it alone. I am a tough women it definately takes more than my husband leaving for and extended period of time to rattle me. But now we head into the "military BS=chaos" bunch of idiot men trying to plan a road trip is what it boils down to. And doing it quickly. My computer room will look like a small army blew up, probably even after he leaves. And now when Perry is off the hook crazy hyper at home and at school. I'll be fine, really I'll be fine. It ain't like it'll be 6 months or some crazy nonsense like that. God kind of made me feel like one of us would be going, kind of had a feeling it wasn't me. Someday my day will come, but probably not until Perry is much older. I'll wait. Send up some words, that I don't lose my mind and Ron is safe from thugs, and disease. And that tragedy effects him in a way that's life changing in a positive way.

The Fathers Song!

Dang I love being an Alpha leader. What a freakin amazing ministry to be a part of. How lucky I am to have this experience. What an awesome ministry. Every single Alpha table I have, has at least one or two Catholics. What a great foundation to build on, but many of them are hurting, and feeling like they so missed something. And they have, they miss out on the personal relationship. To so many of them they learned nothing about a personal relationship with Jesus in all the religion class's they attended, or church services they went to. Why is that? Why in the Catholic faith is Jesus not personalized? How can a person experience grace if they don't know Jesus personally?

Something else we discovered tonight which is rather interesting and I never thought about it. Seperation of church and state even effects Catholic schools. I went to public school, and many at my table went to Catholic school. At know point did any of us learn in school about Jesus as a historical figure. Hello, he was a huge part of history. All of us didn't learn of him in history class until college.

Don't get me wrong, the ceremonies, and rituals can be very beautiful, but rarely does it reach your heart.

Wish this song could be heard but for now here's the lyrics. Love love love it......

I have heard so many songs
Listened to a thousand tongues
But there is one
That sounds above them all
The Father’s song
The Father’s love
You sung it over me and for eternity
It’s written on my heart
CHORUS:
Heaven’s perfect melody
The Creator’s symphony
You are singing over me
The Father’s song
Heaven’s perfect mystery
The king of love has sent for me
And now you’re singing over me
The Father’s song

God's always talking!

Couple interesting things:

2 weeks ago I was totally on a Chris Tomlin kick. So sunday, Robbie plays mostly Chris Tomlin songs, and all the songs I had been listening to, up until the switchfoot release. How does he do that? Totally a God thing. God knows when I am listening, which is usually when I am worshipping which heck now is all the freakin time. Considering I listen to music, often times worship music while I am working. Then in the car on the way home, and then sometimes on the computer when I am surfing. Considering I only sleep 4 hours a night....ok maybe 5, I almost listen to music 18 hours a day....is this possible? Ok wait take out a few hours for TV time, so it's not quite as much, but still quite a bit. I'd say more than 10.

Not changing the video for a while, gotta keep the love going for Switchfoot. If you are a regular blog reader but tired of the song if you hit the big red X in your tool bar it stops the video and the music, and you can continue to read without the song going. I totally understand and respect those who may not have the love for Switchfoot that I do, it may not be for everyone.

Perry cuteness.....saying prayers tonight with no prompts for help from me tonight:

"Dear God
Help us have a wonderful night,
Help the baby tiggie to go to sleep
Thank you for all your beautiful creations.
I love you very much....
Amen"

Now if he'd just stay in bed he'd remain cute.

So obsessed!

With switchfoot that is. Connie bought the CD off of me, so not to worry. Hopefully she loves it as much as I do. And I got the bonus media stuff with my download so all is good. Well Suzie got the boot! So sad, she didn't deserve to go, she delivered each and every week, it was rare for her to have an off week. Mig should have been the one to go. He just doesn't fit, he's too much of a pretty boy. I know JD's going to win, it's so freakin predictable and I absolutely hate it when shows are predictable. Survivor started tonight, they brought Steph and Bobby John back, poor Bobby John was sick and pukin the whole first episode. Man am I a TV junky or what?

Oh and the God job, wasn't given to someone else. That someone else apparently is just doing it temporarily till they fill the job. Who knows, still an option, but God will need to be all over it. Hopefully he is, because Life insurance does not get anymore entertaining, and I should be studying for LOMA....some idiotic test about life insurance. I've failed it twice now, because I don't even open the freakin book, why you ask???? CAUSE IT'S FREAKIN BORING PEOPLE. Why at my age do I want to allow my brain to absorb such literal nonsense, just so I can do a boring job better? Every ounce of my being rejects anything like that. There are people in corporate american who thrive on that crap, who do well in my line of work because they can place themselves in those situations, and enjoy it......ENJOY IT??? I don't see it, I can't make anything I do fun, theres no way to make it fun. It's flat out boring. Now the people I work with.....that's entertainment. Thank God for the folks I see everyday, who make it worth going in for. Now don't get me wrong I could be doing worse, I think......yeah I could be doing worse, I could be doing my husbands job. Now his work is at least not boring, it's the people he works with that are idiotic. LOL.....put our two jobs together you got one good job. Like take the people in my office and have them Go to Ron's work and do his job, and work in his enviroment, and the hours he has to work......OMG....all the sudden I love my job and my husband for the sacrafices he makes just so I can buy another pair of shoes. Thanks honey your the best!

Seriously am I STUPID?

In my desperation for instant gratification. The beloved Switchfoot was on itunes and I downloaded it. So essentially I spent like 25 dollars on Switchfoot in less than 24 hours, how does that happen? So now what do I try to take back the opened CD, maybe exchange it for Matt Redman or something? Do I send EMI and their protection laws hate mail? What would you do? I do like the CD to have and hold and smell, and I could give it do my hubby who has not embraced the ipod generation yet. Ok Ok....shut up I know I'm stupid. But I've spent too much money on worse. I just may have to sleep with Switchfoot tonight, now that they are on the ipod. Ahhh....geez people, I am a married women, and they probably are too, I ment fall asleep jammin out! Ok that video, is awesome, that song is awesome, Jon Foreman is awesome. Have I become completely obsessed? I think I might needed to be medicated.

I LOVE MY IPOD, AND SWITCHFOOT, WHY DO THEY NOT LOVE EACH OTHER?????

Today is Switchfoot release day. I stopped at Family Christian stores quickly on my way to my Alpha leader meeting. Chew'd open the package, to take a peek at the album art which is beautiful. As is lead singer Jon Foreman. But what the hell people, I can't upload the freakin CD to my ipod????????????? I am real mad about this, I listen to my ipod everyday, it's what makes my incredibly boring job bearable. And when I have anticipated a CD for MONTHS, I wanna listen to it on my ipod. I don't wanna dig out my big honking CD player, just to listen to 1 CD....I'd even be willing to download it from itunes, but then would they take my CD back?? Probably not, why cause it's open. And besides last night the CD wasn't on itunes, and because theres some sort of license Mac needs to get so we can have this new switchfoot on the ipod, it probably ain't there now. What a crappy joke. Ok that being said so far what I've heard the CD is off the shizzle! Meaning it's the bomb diggity. They out did themselves. So freakin deep their lyrics, the are genius! Ultimate favorite band of all time has officially be crowned SWITCHFOOT. The new Alpha coordinator was announced tonight, and her name was sadly not Jodi. But the person who did get the job, deserves it, a much more hospitable person than I. I don't plan on persuing the other fulltime position listed at VCC that I could be suited for, I'll wait and see if God has anything up his sleeve, not giving up on that "God" job, it just has to be right for me. I really don't think God intends for me to be in life insurance for much longer. He knows my heart, he'll hook me up, he always does when the time is right.

Rock Star Inxs, was slammin tonight, and I swear I am not fickle they are all just so dang good that I can't stick with just one and vote them all the way to the end. Tonight my vote with with Suzie. Tonight she was completely natural. I mean it just seemed natural her up there on stage!
She sang "What's going on?" By 4 Non Blondes, one of my all time favorite songs! And it was written by Linda Perry, who dropped out of sight after tha big hit, until she wrote party started for Pink who also dropped out of sight. Anyways it was my first time hearing Dirty Vegas, by JD. And I tell ya what, I seriously can't stand JD, he's way too full of himself, and arrogant. But that song is awesome. Almost better than Marty's Trees song, but I can't get Trees out of my head. Dirty Vegas I soon forgot, but stylistically it was great. So I think Mig should go next week. He's too theatrical, doesn't really seem like a rock star. I want them to keep Suzie now, my mind may change next week. Actually I guarentee you my mind will change since it has every week. Maybe they should keep Suzie, and she can sing Dirty Vegas, it could be their first single together. Yeah Yeah....theres a great idea. Now if they take that idea, I need to get a kick back. Oh gotta give a shout out to Dave Navarro, is he not the coolest guitarist ever?? Now to figure out away to get these freakin Switchfoot songs onto my ipod, anybody got any ideas? I am mad at you Jon for doing this to me!

REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE!

It's all rather silly for me to get bent out of shape over not getting a design team position, I am human however. Then at church this morning the message was basically, What is your God given dream? Well it sure ain't to be on a design team somewhere on the world wide web. Not at all, sure that'd be fun, but I can't say that it is my dream. Certainly not my God given dream anyways. For some that is the case, they live and breath making layouts to showcase for the world to see, and to keep up with the trends so they can get published. Nope, not what I think about every given moment, so maybe it was a God thing I didn't make it so that someone who has that dream can have that. So what is it, that fuels my fire? What do I think about most often? What is my God given dream? Pretty much what my churches mission statement is. To love the city of Cincinnati, or Fairfield, into a relationship with Jesus Christ. That people is really who I am. So those of you who don't know me from some other state, country or hee hee planet, may think that means I'm some crazy Jesus freak, yellin at folks to "TURN OR BURN", not so at all. It's all about how you live and who you are. To represent God in a way that makes people question, "why is she so happy." or "why does she appear to have it all together?" Or why is she involved in Alpha? Or why is she always talking about NOT gossiping? Or why does she listen to that music? Or why is she buying me lunch, or giving me something she's made. Or spending time with me, or listening to me. It's just who I am, and it's what I was made for. So my God dream is to have a God job, whether I actually get paid for it is another story. Might just be volunteer. Or it may not be now but someday when I am a missionary in a foreign land. I keep praying....God knows my heart.

Verse of the week:
"I am like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever I do prospers." Psalm 1:3

It's September 11th...on the way home from church we saw a street lined with American flags in rememberance. We drove down, and I thought about that day, and all the lives that were lost. Seems like so much more could happen today to remember. Should be some sort of memorial type holiday.

Wow!

Just really took a good look at the lead singer of Coldplay (the video playing), and the lead singer is rather dreamy. Speaking of dreamy SWITCHFOOT'S NEW ALBUM COMES OUR TUESDAY.....I will own it that day or download it......how about a vote....do I download or own the actual CD....leave vote in comments. Look at that over it in a matter of minutes. Returning to my regularly scheduled life now!

Set up to be bummed out!

Ok so maybe I am trying for too much that is just not attainable for me? Maybe I am hangin out with the wrong scrappin peeps? I mean I feel like I got skills, maybe not HOF (hall of fame) skills, tried that way too many times at some point you gotta just say "You don't got it!" So thought I'd try for a design team gig, not a super big website, with super famous folks hangin out, but moderately popular, with varying skilled scrappers and the design team is great with varying styles as well. Thought it was attainable, for me to at least make 1 round. Ok so maybe I thought it was attainable out of 50 scrappers, but 150 entered....WHAT THE? Yeah my 8.5 x 11 tiny pages were completely lost in the sea of 12 x 12 scrappers. It was completely anonymous so it was fairly bias, but that doesn't mean the designers voting weren't all looking for the same thing. For the most part, people who make it through on these things are pretty trendy scrappers, and granted they need that cause that's what sells the stuff. So I guess I am glad, I didn't abandon my style to do trendy stuff to make it in. Nor would I ever, so therefor, guess I won't make it on any design team. Unless they are looking for an eclectic, artsy fartsy, occasionally trendy style. Oh and only 8.5 x 11, maybe sometimes smaller for a gift....or an art journal. Or maybe a mail art designer....anyone looking for that kind of designer? Ok whatever.....PMS....and not making an audition round....REALLY bad mix. Last week I would have been so over the whole thing in like 2 hours. It would just be really cool to be on just 1 design team, I'm not asking for a whole bunch, just one that I give a rip about. Not just someplace I'll show up and do a little chatter for the soul purpose of getting a hook up. Ok I'm done officially over that.....sorry if I offended anyone, but if you were coming here and expecting me to NOT be honest you came to the wrong blog!

In other news, I sent in my resume for a part-time job at VCC. Ron is saying no we can't afford it. I am saying if the pay is reasonable, and it's something that God wants me to do, well then God will hook me up. Part time as in not another job but my only job. May not be for me, but that's up to God to make perfectly clear, he's good at that. Sure I questioned it about a million times whether to even try, and everyone I spoke to for advice without even taking a breath or thinking they'd say GO FOR IT! I'll keep you posted. It may be Gods desire to have my brain sucked out through my ear, while processing policy changes for the rest of my life. But hey I'll be a witness for him in the corporate world. I've not given up completely on the God job thing though if this isn't the one, maybe something else. My goal is to get me a God job, or a scrap job. Scrap jobs at this point are very hard to get, very competitive, and I crumble under that kind of pressure. I think my pretty new pink flip flops may have taken away my design team debackle (is that a word) blues. Might be so over it tomorrow and able to get on with my life.

Praying for Change!

Ok so not much going on here except the P-man got his wig busted and he's been rather charming ever since. Also check out Heathers Blog, it's dang funny! So glad it's friday!

Change

I do not like change. Does anyone really. Theres the excitement of the unknown and new things, but comfort and routine are much more cozy. I feel a change coming on. I don't know what, or who is going to be doing the changing, I just feel it somewhere on the horizon. I need to be fullfilled, and I need to enjoy life more. I'd like to figure out how to make that happen. I'm not talking about the occasional shopping spree, or the occasional hook up with my peeps, or adventure with the fam. I am talking daily fullfillment, like a sense of purpose. Like when I wake up in the morning I want to feel like theres a purpose to my day.

Yeah that's just me, and me talking about me. Pretty much an ok thing to do. I am all filled up to emotional crap with the Hurricane craziness. Watching way too much Fox News, Folks talking, talking, talking. Just get those people out of their, they are endangering their lives the longer they stay there in the disease soup. Soldiers degotiating with folks, is nonsense, if they don't have the mental ability to understand.....you are going to die here, you'll just need to manhandle them. Take them to the empty military bases and help them rebuild their lives, done deal. Sounds like they didn't have much to begin with, what you give them will probably be more than they had. Just freakin do it, and quit talking about whether it is politically ok. If you don't get them out of there that's just more bodies the soldiers, (one of which could be my husband) has to clean up when the water is gone.

Book Page

jodi sexton's page
Originally uploaded by KristinaR.

Some Mail art I did for one of my mail art peeps. So fun! I must say it looks cooler than when I finished it, I didn't plan any of it, I just pulled out some stuff and winged it. Love doing that and it turns our cool.

Confessions and Observations from a Shopaholic

• Bridgewater shopping area is way way too close to my house.
• Old Navy having plus size clothing isn't necessarily a good thing
• Old Navy being that close to my house may not be a good thing either
• It's a possibility the entire family will be dressing sporty
• Clinton and Stacy from What not to Wear do eventually have an effect on you.
• Michaels coupon must be spent on something even if you don't NEED anything
• It's important to escape the house when your child is not on his ADHD medication.
• I do lose my patience, it happens believe me.
• My child DOES need to be medicated, for everyone's sanity and safety.
• He is still alive and not wounded in anyway.
• Target has cool new scrappin stuff. Which you may not be able to resist, so don't go.
• Target has the best jammies, those are easier to resist, they'll be there for weeks, and might go on clearance soon.
• Once the scrappin world finds out about the cool stuff at Target, it'll be gone in no time.
• I do still remember how to cook.
• Corn on the Cob is very good.
• So is Goetta.
• Both those in one weekend.....bad idea.
• Praying for a friend.
• Tradgedy really puts your life in perspective. Seems subconsciously my husband and I both realize this and fought less than ever before this weekend. And the kid was even unmedicated. Truly God working to make us grateful!

Yowza!

Ok so I leave for many, many hours shopping with Cyndi today. Major retail therapy, and wow White Castles has really good sweet tea, how come no one has told me this? Got to drive Ron's new car, he was rather reluctant to give it up. While I was gone, the man cleaned my car, like the thing is spotless, inside and out.....AHHHHHHHHHH.......I'll be expected to keep it this way. The stress is almost unbearable. We shopped so much my feet still hurt, but I got some much "needed" scrapbook supplies. Now in the event the city runs out of gas, and I can't leave my house, I am sufficently stocked up, and then some. All you shopaholics in the FF area....OLD NAVY IS NOW OPEN! So is chili's where I had dinner this evening and it was so yummy. And the staff was amazingly nice. My long weekend is off to a great start. And I got a new cute skirt too. Who ever invented the just below the knee A-line skirt, flattering to the full figure gal is a freakin genius, I'll post a pic if I take a decent one. Praying daily and wishing I could go help those in the gulf states. It all sucks real bad. I try not to think about it, my heart can only take on so much heart ache.

Well would you look at that!

I've been Tagged! By my good friend who moved far far away, Lisa! I sort of had to beg for the tag, but I refused to list 5 random things about myself without first being tagged. So now I am tagged.

1. I've had my dream car. It was a 1975 Gold, Super Beetle. Had it before I got married. We
drove off in it to start our new life together in Georgia. Actually there was a tiny problem
with the starter so everytime we stopped for gas we had to push start it. Rather amusing to
see the newlyweds with the big JUST MARRIED on the back window push starting their car.
now my dream car is this! I know, I know it's a woody, but it sure is smooth. Can't afford to put gas in
it now, but someday, maybe when I'm retired and am doing a lot of camping. LOL

2. Last time I TP'd someone's house was only 5 years ago, I was 31, and it was my mothers house. My best friend and I took our husbands and our children to help. Yes I took picture and scrapped a page about it. Hee Hee.....

3. My wedding reception was the last one they had at a local retirement community because it was too wild, and the police were called.

4. I was once chased by a whole herd of cattle. Wearing brand new red leather Nike's.

5. I wish I was a missionary living in some remote land, instead of having my brain sucked out through my ear working for a life insurance company.

Ok there's 5 random things now all you people who secretly stalk me, and read my blog regularly leave a comment along with 5 random things. and now I shall tag...............the ever so talented, and way too busy to kick it with me............STACIE.......!

Weekend Madness!

I did some mail art finally on Friday night. Although I did not scan it before I put it in the envelope. Sorry hopefully the recipient will scan and then I'll post. We actually ate dinner at home on friday night. Very rare, we are usually off and running on Friday. Saturday I hooked up with my Alpha coach in the AM so excited to get back into Alpha! Then I hooked up with Weezer and Abby and we went and had some beers at the Hoffbrauhaus. I say beers as if we were doing some major drinking. Yeah right. We each had just samples of each beer which was about equal to one whole beer. Woohoo....big drinkers! We did however eat like we'd never eat again and we were trying to kill ourselves on as much fried food and sweets as we could consume! We started with Pretzels and Beer cheese, and some fried pickles. Insanity. Well that was so good we thought, why get a meal why not get some more appetizers? Yeah 2 sampler platters later we felt like one of thoe big fat german fellows who looks like he's got some serious GAS! So we thought why not finish this food extravaganza with a ginormous cream puff? We inhaled the first one, then Weezer and I were bummed we didn't have coffee, so we had ANOTHER CREAM PUFF, so we could have some coffee. Good Lord, you can only do that kind of eating once or twice a year. BARF! And me with no Camera, go figure.

Why on earth was the VMA's just non-stop hip hop? Ever heard of good old fashion Rock and Roll people, it's good music and it makes sense and those guys don't look like idiots on stage. Enough with Puff Daddy and Snoop, WE WANT MORE COLD PLAY AND THE KILLERS! At least I do anyways!

Truly a Blessing

So I go to Krogers to pick up some items so it appears that I have food in my house, and aren't compelled to frequent the local fast food establishment. Not to mention I needed to purchase some lysol wipes for Perry's 2nd grade teacher. That's the post it he chose. She's in for a treat I bought the super jumbo size, she should be good until Christmas. As I am placing my groceries into my trunk I pick up a bag of 2 very nice looking ribeye steaks, funny I don't recall spending 17 dollars on 2 ginormous steaks, and hamburgers. Hummm...check receipt, nope didn't pay for them either although they are in my possession. Place them in the trunk and start to close it. Devil on one shoulder, angel on the other. "It's their fault, they gave them to you.", "But I didn't pay for them, someone must have left them, they might be their dinner tonight.", "Maybe they are giving away steaks and hamburgers with each order this evening." Glance over at my oblivious, impressionable child, whose humming some song from Osmosis Jones. And think, yeah I should take these back in. So I do, tell the inappreciative women behind the service deck, "unless you are giving away steaks tonight these ain't mine." She says huh...Someone's gonna be mad, I said well I didn't pay for them so here ya go, waiting for a thanks for being honest, or something......silence.....Hummmm, should have kept the damn things dang. Yeah my conscience would have got the best of me. Speaking of the impressionable child. First day of school went rather smooth. He began the dressing process on his own, just as I had hoped. He woke before the chirping bird alarm, and was naked by the time it went off and I got up. Reminder #1 to get dressed occurred just before I showered. After shower, he had his shorts on. Reminder #2, I get dressed. He now has on some socks. Reminder #3, I go make oatmeal, he's got on his t-shirt, just before I lost it at reminder #4 I grabbed his button up shirt, and shoes and finished the process that should never take 30 minutes! We'll get this process down soon I promise. Fortunately for him he's so dang sweet and cute, you can't hurt him, you just wanna squeeze him and kiss him! Last night after meet the teacher night he was saying his prayers. And the end he blesses folks. So I said "who do you wanna bless?" he thinks....."who are you thinking about for tomorrow?" Thinking he'll say his second grade teacher, nope, he says "I think I'd like to bless the little girl in my class in the wheel chair, what's her name Mommy?".....Elizabeth....."God bless Elizabeth, and God bless Mrs. Emenaker (his first grade teacher), I'm sure gonna miss her." He eventually got around to blessing his 2nd grade teacher too, but he had to cover who was on his mind first. He's definitely a heart toucher. He loves to wave at random folks, it's almost as if he knows who needs a cute wave from a friendly little boy. When we were getting in our car tonight, our car was next to a women's who was sitting in her car waiting apparently for someone. She had that "a lot on her mind" look. Perry crawls over from his side of the back seat to the other to wave to her and smile. You could tell she was touched. And as we are pooling away he looks up smiles and waves again and yells bye! It's indescibable what he does to people but it's very simple, and touching, not just some goofy kid trying to get a reaction he genuinely wants to touch folks. We are truly blessed!

Truly a Puzzle

Nemo Cellphone: $5.00

Shirt from Jc Penny's: 2 for 14

size 2 shorts form Steve and

Berry's (sized wierd): $5.00

Brand new size 13 Sketchers:

Way too much!

Gap hat: 2.50

Starwars Underwear: 6.99 3pack

Playing back to school dress-up

with a reluctant 8 year old.......

PRICELESS

And along with the Spirit,a voice:"This is my Son,chosen and
marked by my love,delight of my life."
Matthew 3:17 (Message Bible)
Wow you people are good! No crazy acronyms and I was in no way intimidated. (I think IEP was used, but ha ha I know that one!) Either I got the hang of this, or it was a God thing probably a combination of both! The good news is (well it is for me) he qualifies for special ed. I guess this would not be good news to some parents, but it's good news if it means Perry will get the extra help he needs to learn. I doubt he'll be scarred for life, he's excited he gets to be in 2 classrooms instead of 1, and have more than one teacher. It's all in the presentation. Goal right now is to convince him that he's smart. Right now he'll tell you that he's not smart, no matter how many times I try to convince him that he is smart. It breaks my heart to hear him say that outloud. Because I know he's smart, but someone has told him otherwise. (don't let me find you!) Perry is definately a puzzle, very difficult to figure out what works for him, you can tell he's learning but to figure out how it's getting in there is exhausting, he can't be tested like other kids, he just won't sit for it. And his attention span is about 2 seconds on a good day possibly 5 seconds. Thanks for all your prayers, it totally worked. I'll add you to the list of people Perry should thank when he's a rich and famous artist!

Larryboy

larryboy
Originally uploaded by Yoda0419.

If you click on Larryboy, it'll take you to more Perry Artwork. Some folks at school were asking to see his artwork so I scanned some in to Flikr. There photo's there of summer camp also if anyones interested. Warning theres a lot of pictures.

Start Your Prayer engines!

Ok the first of probably many intervention meetings happens tomorrow. This is when a parent of a child goes to a meeting at the school that will involve, last years teacher, this years teacher, a reading teacher, an assistant principle, school psychologist, speech teacher (I think she's there for communication reasons, not speech), and this year we are throwing in a special ed teacher. And for added kicks I am taking a very reluctant husband. Granted he'll be there for looks alone, because I promise you, he will contribute NOTHING to the conversation. Unless Mr. Martin (school principle) shows up he'll be the only man in the room. Perry gets his reluctentness to try new things from you guessed it dear old dad. I envision him as a child being drug to new things not wanting to budge much like Mr. Perry. But I informed him he must attend this first meeting to see what I go through and to appreciate my parenting skills. Nuff said. He'll survive.

By the end of last year these meeting got increasingly intimidating. I had not yet learned to speak up for myself, like "hey that acronym you just used, what the hell does it mean??" I can't say that I have learned now, but I feel more confident in my right as a parent, I've done a little reading. Doesn't change the fact that the school people talk school talk, and Hello....I barely know Life Insurance talk after 12 years, now I gotta learn a whole new lingo! So everyone get into prayer mode, pray for no more additional mind altering medications, a nice little IEP in place with some help from the special ed department. (notice the acronym, I'm practicing!) and a happy school loving kid. If all this happens, nobody will get hurt! Get praying people!


Oh and heres the kid you'll be praying for! Cute photo I cropped out of a group shot, cause he looked cute. He's sitting quitely and being quiet. Very odd moment. But I love the flushed cheeks and the sweaty hair. We went to the Loveland Castle with the Cub Scouts. Most of the boys stayed the night, we did not. Wasn't down with sleeping outside a haunted castle by myself in a tent. Ron was away for the weekend. It was fun to hang out and explore till late at night. Very cool!

CUTE!

Dangit Shelley I'm gonna be late for church, and it's all your fault had to get this up on the blog....this is dang cute. And NO it does not make me want another one! Look how cute this baby is!

What's the Time?

I'm sorry what's that? Oh.....YES I KNOW IT'S ALMOST 3 AM.....GET OVER IT PEOPLE. I think one of my problems with going to bed at a reasonable hour, is I had a strict bedtime as a kid, and since I am now an adult....ha ha....you can't make me. Yeah I pay for that often. I told you I have issues. But the important thing is I got to scrap. I could feasably scrap at home, heck it's obvious by my surroundings I am not cleaning my house. But I always feel guilty, (and I ain't even catholic) that I should be spending time with my family. Watching a movie with my husband or playing with Perry. I rarely watch a movie with my husband at home, the man refuses to watch anything I like. We did however watch The Terminal last weekend. Ron got suckered into watching it cause Tom Hanks is in it, and ever since Saving Private Ryan he's go great respect for the man. So ha ha....sucker you watched a love story! I think he even got a little misty! It's a great movie, I highly recommend it. I am a scrappin fool. Here's what I've scrapped lately. I love this page, it was inspired by a page in Designing with stamps I believe. But the pictures and the memories are so fun. Perry has such an imagination. The kid literally does not need toys. He can make a toy out of anything. I think we buy toys more for ourselves than him, because we like them. Life the little Star Wars Galactic heroes, we bought another set, Perry didn't really ask for them, we just got them cause they are so dang cute. Little chunky Star Wars figures, he's almost too old for them but they are so dang cute! He'll play with them for a moment and then go draw something and cut it out and play with it. Why do we buy this kid toys?????

Crazy...maybe!

Why is it I don't feel like doing anything until midnight. All the sudden I have all this energy like I got all the time in the world and I don't have to get up at like 6:30 am, realistically that is what time I should get up and get moving. But it rarely if ever happens. Little experiment going on here. Perry has a new alarm clock, it has sounds to fall to sleep to, and the past 2 night he's been falling asleep to the sounds of the ocean. Hummm....good then I don't have to hear disney tunes, or veggie tunes as he falls asleep, and oddly it's worked he's stayed in bed, must be soothing. Then the alarm clock has waking up options also. A buzzer, Birds, and a rooster. He doesn't get up to birds, he just listens to them, but the rooster however has another effect, I heard the rooster going off so went to see what his response was cause it wasn't getting turned off.....he was curlled up with his hands over his ears real tight. LOL.....yeah he wasn't digging the rooster. So next week we add the pressure of getting dressed immediately after the alarm goes off to prepare him for school which starts on wednesday....yippee....lots of good school news already. God seems to be listening too me. His teacher is someone my mom has known for many years from church. And he's not changing rooms, he'll be in the same classroom he was in last year. So theres not the added stress of finding his class he already knows where it is. Awesome. Our first intervention meeting is Monday, and a special ed teacher is scheduled to be there so that sounds promising. Truth is, I am praying he gets the help he needs, I know his little brain can handle and learn the stuff they are throwing at him, he just needs to learn to focus and take in all they throw at him. Come out of the world of Perry and be present mentally at school just for those 6 hours, and hopefully he won't have a ton of homework and he can go back to Perryland while he's at home. Heres to a less stressful, less work for me at home school year.

Video: Nickel Creek~ This Side
Love this song, love this group. This was one of my all time favorite concerts. Ron and I went and had Perry with us. We rode down to tall stacks with Perry on the Metro, just to see them. Perry fell asleep and Ron just carried him around, we laid on the grass by the river listening to them, then went and got right in the middle of the crowd durring a really fun song, Ron carrying a sleeping kid and me dancing around. So fun! If you don't know them you should check them out, a really great band!

Rubber is mounted and Cut!

It's all done, there was a lot of it too. Man once I get started I can't stop. But there is no unmounted rubber in my house, unless it belongs to someone else. LOL....Haven't had a chance to play with any of my new supplies yet, but I will this week I promise.

Dave had another great message at church again this week. This whole relationship series all summer has been great, we actually apply what's said in church to our lives almost weekly. Ron seems to be doing the same thing also which is huge. Normally he snoozes right through church. This morning though.....:::::over crowded church rant::::::we ran a tiny bit late, and good Lord what the heck happened, word must have got out that Dave would be talking about "what women want men to know about them" or something cause it was so freakin crowded. Granted I know I go to a mega church and this should be expected, but dang, drop P off to his class, head upstairs to grab some coffee and get in my seat........NO COFFEE........should have been my first clue, head into the auditorium, and good grief....no seats within eye sight.....knew if I found a random seat Ron wouldn't find me in a million years. So waited by the door. Waited and waited some more. Man I hate that screws up my whole worship experience. He finally shows up, and we make the hike to the nose bleeds......just like in any church, the folks in the back don't sing, at all. And at my church that's where the parents with the bad kids go thinking folks who sit in the back aren't there to actually experience church, they really came just to sit and listen to screaming kids for an hour. I am glad they came, and hope they got something from the message, but HELLO there's childcare not to mention a family room, not to mention an atrium with tons of monitors, so your kids could go buckwild while you enjoy the message and not disturb anyone else. In between the screaming kids, I was able to take home a little something for this week. Interesting point Anita (Daves wife, he interviewed her) made, was she and Dave made a promise to not discuss the other persons families mental state. It's hurtful, and unnessesary. I know my families crazy, and don't need to be informed as such. Same goes for Ron. I made mention of that point to Ron later, so hopefully we'll make strides in that area, which #1 will strengthen our relationship, and #2 quite possibly Lord willing....will break the crazy cycle.