Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Never Easy!

I wish I could give other people what I have. Patience, discernment, understanding....for some reason I have it. Sometimes it's a gift sometimes I see it as a curse. I try to explain to other people and I can't seem to form the words to describe it, and I get puzzled looks. If it was up to my husband we'd avoid situtations that show that Perry's quite different than his peers. But my theory is if he doesn't see that others see him as different and the environment is somewhat controlled and safe for him, let him experience these things in his own way. Sure I hear the other parents whisper, or even talk loudly about the clueless kid who is looking rather unaware, and it hurts sometimes because they don't realize that's my kid they are talking about and it's ok if he's clueless, he's out there and thats all that matters to me. It gives other kids the oppurtunity to learn compassion, and to help kids like him and some of them do....not many, but some are helpful. Or it gives the dad who has volunteered the oppurtunity to use his obvious gift to pin point a kid whose got some major issues with focusing and help him feel included and remind him over and over again where he needs to be, never seeming to get tired of it and happy to help. These people all exist in the world. The whispering parent, the gifted volunteer, the compassionate peer, and the clueless little boy. Unfortunately it often seems like theres only one clueless little boy, and he happens to be mine.

Perry did the basketball clinic tonight. It was great Terry Nelson led it he's a former UC Bearcat from their Final Four days back in the early 90's. It was so so good for Perry, these christian based sporting activities are awesome. Terry was good at making most of the boys feel important and included including Perry. Who was sporting his super cool Bazooka Joe high tops, which all the little boys thought were super cool.

So Perry had some moments of frustration this evening. When he gets frustrated he squeezes his little lips together and gives a little growl....to me it's just what he does to other it may appear to be a bit odd...and he hits too forgot that part. Not hard just a slap on the arm from being frustrated, it's how he copes. Although this is annoying and frustrating to me in public....hello people don't get that. So we had some time after we got home to discuss these anger outbursts. We were in the car chatting. And we agreed on a "control your anger technique", I even included a little role play so he'd know when it was appropriate. Instead of hitting he's decided to take a deep breath. And if he's really, really, really (I think he included 5 really's here) angry he'll take 3 deep breaths. So cute, he even demo'd it for Geegaw......lets hope it works and he's able to follow through.


Heather said...

Jodi! I have a growler! Hadley growls like a DOG when she's angry -- this IS our coping mechanism from SCREAMING! What a funny coincidence!!

You are such a good mom for Perry! God sure knew what he was doing when we gave Perry to you...!

sewcynful said...

I am so impressed with how you are with Perry. Yes, patience is a gift, and you have it. I also think it's a gift God gave the mothers more than the fathers, so naturally the moms end up being more of the caregiver, supporter, cheerleader, prayer, etc, for that special child. You should be proud of yourself for enabling Perry so many neat opportunities.

Teresa said...

Hey, what's wrong with growling? LOL! I growl all the time when I'm frustrated just ask my coworker, my husband, and my kids. All kidding aside, you are a great mother and Perry is so blessed to have you.

Julie S. said...

What we need is .....ACCEPTANCE. You are blessed to have found a sporting environment where Perry can participate and it seems a coach that is very accepting. And Perry is blessed to have you as his mom!